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| Madhurima Nigam & Sonu Nigam |
We have all heard of the quote; "Behind every successful man, is a great woman", but after speaking to Madhurima Nigam, designer and wife to Sonu Nigam, my thoughts shifted to believe that instead, it is "a great woman that is at the forefront of every successful man". She stands in front, not because it is a race to see who is ahead or who to put it ever so bluntly, 'wear's the pants', but instead, she is at the front because she is 'the woman', the woman who supports him as opposed to impedes him of his goals in life and career. She inspires him to be his ultimate complete, and therefore often, she is mistaken to be behind, because noone else can hear her voice.
I had the pleasure of speaking with Madhu, and what begun as I thought to be a structured interview, to my surprise, flowed into a relaxed conversation about goals, perceptions, expectations, motherhood, dreams, womanhood, the past, the present, life, love and everything else in between. I hope through this article, I will successfully convey to my readers, the voice of Madhurima Nigam.
Not so much her story, but more so, a small glimpse and understanding into her life as a 'celebrity' wife, a mother and a successful business woman. I always pen my articles from a personal perspective, and from there I take away with me how I believe the information should be best understood through my words.
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| Madhurima Nigam |
When I first spoke with Madhurima, I didn't know what to expect, I had thoughts of; will she come across as confronting, female pro quo, accommodating, or would she want to just hurry this up. After all, I was about to delve into personal conversations with the woman whom many know of as the other half, and as wikipedia puts it, 'spouse' to Indian singer Sonu Nigam. Our exchange of words turned into the type of conversation's you would have on the couch with your girl friends, this ease of conversation, made way for genuine question's on my part and just as much, genuine responses from Madhurima. Madhurima is soft spoken, articulate and definitely with a calming and grounded presence, but with an equally intelligent strength.
There are four distinct sides to Madhurima Nigam, her life as a mother to her son Nevaan, her life as the partner and wife to her husband Sonu Nigam, her life as a designer and of course her life as Madhu, 'her own', and so I begin to best tell or re-tell the four sides to Madhurima Nigam..........
Madhurima the designer / the business woman:
Madhurima designed for the most part of six to seven years for her husband Sonu Nigam, for his concerts, special events and television shows. It was through the encouragement of family, friends and the increasing request for her designs, that Madhurima decided to launch her own label "Madhurima Nigam", in 2011. Although young by years, the label has grown at an organic pace. Madhurima Nigam, the label, is geared towards a specific couture line for men's style, and naturally she would bring her designs to life, through what she says the greatest inspiration behind her designs is her husband, because "when I design for him, I know that I am doing the job well" - Madhurima Nigam.
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| Madhurima Nigam design |
Her designs depict a traditional yet independent take on men's jackets, with a strong take predominantly in playing with block colour choices in black, and the often featured Indian style Sherwani jackets. Her pieces are couture, with her current collection based on the 'Dark night's of partying in mind". I can only interpret this as something.. elusive, dusk in darkness and underground with a hint of an alumni feeling, we play till we see........
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| Madhurima Nigam and her designs |
Madhurima has spent the most part of her time focusing on raising their son Nevaan, with design taking a back seat, with the passing of her mother - in - law earlier in the year. Having only just recently re-immersed herself into her label again, Madhurima is now taking it in her pace, branching out to set up a home for her designs, as she speaks about her vision for the Madhurima Nigam label, excited with plans in the next six months to open her own multi-level designer store, and then within the next three years, to explore online avenues.
Madhurima the mother:
As the mother to son Nevaan, Madhurima comes alive when she speaks about Nevaan. It is evident of her immense warmth and love that she carries for her son, as she tells me about how her whole life is first and foremost as a mother to her son and wife to her husband. Like all mother's Madhurima has an innate nurturing side that is selflessly dedicated to protecting Nevaan in this world, to surround him with only those who will positively enrich his upbringing and add valuable lessons to his school of life, and to also allow him to experience and nurture his natural gift, because it is those moments that will eventually create Nevaan's story. Madhurima says that life has definately slowed down, now that Nevaan has started school, and so a routine must take place, not only so Nevaan can feel very much stable in a very 'high profile' lifestyle, but so Madhurima can also focus more on her career. When asked what keeps her grounded, without any hesitation, she tells; "spending time with my son". No doubt, I gathered, that Madhurima had gained a sense of new, in becoming a mother.
Madhurima the wife:
I candidly ask Madhu about her personal views on being married to one of India's most recognised profiles in the entertainment industry, and her replies are nothing but words that stem from a grateful, humble and 'loving' place. Madhurima did not paint anything with rainbow colours, nor allowed it to be seen through rose coloured glasses when I asked her about the pressures, if any, being the partner to a very famous man. Again, with her very honest approach, she tells me; "at times it is very challenging, as you have to be the 'picture perfect' wife, with a certain image you have to fit into, and you are constantly at gunpoint to the expectations of others. You have to be alert, well groomed and strong willed". Madhurima answered this question with an ever so slight humour, as she has a natural ability to make things not get to the better of her. How then does she become all those things?.. "you stop reacting" was her reply. I take it, she was hinting, you have to know how to sift away the things that don't matter, and instead embrace the things that do or will matter.
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She tells me, "my husband is an amazing father... an amazing man, and in the last few years I have.... we have... grown up together". When Madhurima spoke of her husband, she had a tone of a very proud partner. She says "my husband is an extremely creative man, he thinks on a level that is deep and from within, and therefore he is so great at what he does, his achievements, including being a wonderful father to Nevaan.
Madhu the woman:
In this part, I wanted to understand about Madhu in her own skin, her own beliefs about life, love and simple things in general. To put aside her role as a mother, and wife, and to answer some questions which would allow her to be in the space of a free thinker. I wanted her to openly discuss about being "Madhu the woman". The purpose was to hopefully have her honest words become a platform to empower many other women of past and present generations. Regardless of the fact that she is the partner to a famous man, but she is also a successful business woman, who has a vision, future goals and direction, she is a mother, and at times, there a days when she is not all perfect.
I asked Madhu, "if she could go back to a certain point in her life, which part would it be and why?" I explained to her that this question is not necessarily one to reflect on regret, but instead to positively look at it as; "if you were to return to your past, and experience something again, what would it be?". To which she replied; "I would go back to when I was 18 years old and do again all the things that I didn't do, pursue my career as a dancer and to explore life in a different way, this... which I am trying to do now". She answered this with contentment and excitement, content that although she did not nurture herself as a dancer, it did not mean it hindered what she would do now in life. "The present is the most happiest phase of your life" and from this, I take it, that Madhurima is completely in her 'present'.
Madhu and I spoke about the controversial yet universal language called, 'Love'. Her definition of love - "love is understanding, love is a mental emotion, my love for my husband is never-ending, and not because I simply love him, but because I understand him and with understanding, comes a genuine love. She continues to say that 'love can also be over rated and can also bring about evil, by way of obsession and possession and so it is important to grow with love. As a woman, you need to recognise whether you are in love with the feeling, or you are in love with the person. She carries on to say that motherhood has given her extra love, to receive and give. Motherhood makes you a better woman, at times it is challenging to everything in your life, but there is something about the women who are mother's who have that real organic love. Not at all impeding on women who are not mother's, we are either meant to be or not.
I asked Madhu if she could impart advice to other women on how to overcome adversity in their lives, what would she share, to which she replied; "you must look at adversities in your life with a positive approach. Life ahead of me, is far more beautiful. The way you think that your life should take shape will allow you to find happiness in something else.. change the present situation".
Madhu believes that adversities may appear to put you back five steps, but really, it pushes you to leap ten steps. She believes that everything is meant to happen and it happens for a reason, un - benounced to what that reason may be, but the reason is always for the better, because adversity comes with it a lesson and with the lesson comes the truth and with truth comes your destiny.. your meant to be. At this point of the conversation, Madhu and I both agreed there was a reason she and I were to have this conversation and connection, she said "I feel like I've known you for ages", and for me..... I shared the same thought. I guess, this easy flow of conversation came down to.. maybe it was so I could have a comfortable and honest understanding of Madhu the woman, and for her, to trust in me, that I would take her words and re-tell it on a level where those who read it will take something from it. Although I am sure, that personally, we both have our own understanding as to what that reason may be.
I left my conversation with Madhu, knowing exactly how I would compose this piece. It was my intention and is my intention, that those who read this will have a greater understanding about the general topics in life and how important it is to retain that small piece of 'you' regardless of the many sides that you have to be in your life. I enjoyed my conversation with Madhu, as it was one of the most thought provoking conversations I have had in awhile. I'm not quite sure what Madhu may have taken away with our conversation.. but for me, it reminded me to not 'waste time'....
"Time is the most precious thing in our lives, you cannot waste time. Use your time in doing thing's that make you happy, place your energy into thing's that will bring about happiness in the long run, and have no regrets in life, because everything that you do teaches you something" - Madhurima Nigam.
Kim T.
Madam AE xx
Images: Madhurima Nigam.
